Monday, November 22, 2010

Criticisms

Some days, I hear the same criticisms over and over again.  Im a tease.  Im fake.  Ive changed.  Im not who I used to be.  And some days, it really hurts.  and on others, i've just grown so immune to it, it doesnt phase me anymore.  And ive tried to change.  Really.  I have.  Just everytime I try, I try too hard, and end up questioning everything i do, everything i say, and wonder, what will people say about me?  And its exhausting. and depressing.  because I can never be the girl I used to be. 

I hate who I am now.  Because I am everything I get criticized for, and it bothers me that I cant change.  But most of all, I hate that Im losing friends because of it. 

I WILL try to change, but I wouldnt have any high expectations.  Im sorry.  I really am.  But sometimes, I just really dont care anymore. 

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